Monday, December 27, 2010

Refresh | Monday Musing

Last week, it seemed like it rained for 40 days and 40 nights and I loved it. See, I know that for some rain is mildly depressing for all the obvious reasons, but for me it's a welcome occurrence. Ever notice how clear everything looks? How clean and fresh the air smells? The rain washes away the muck that builds up. All that smog washed away leaves the environment crisp and bright.

Back in early fall, I went back to my roots in Northern California for a childhood friend's wedding. My visits to NorCal are always so bittersweet. It's natural and expected that we miss our family and friends when we're away, but over the years I've noticed another thing or two that I miss: the Optimistic Me. The loudest girl in the room. The one who, no matter what, always had her friend's back. The one always looking for a good time. The one willing to explore uncharted waters (it's funny how having an overprotective Mom can do that to a girl). The one who would spontaneously burst into song when she's happy (well, I still do that). The one who proudly touted her NorCal background by using "hella" when the situation called for it. My husband met that person years ago, but over time Optimistic Me has been overtaken by Cynical Me. I can't say that my cynicism was a new thing, as it's always been there lurking in the shadows. And, honestly, I think it's a necessary part of me.

So call me weird (I prefer "random"), but I'll take last week's stormy weather as my sign to change things around. You don't get to pick the cards you're dealt, you just have to do your best to work with what you have.*

* I have no idea how to play cards (remember, sheltered child), but I'm willing to try. And really isn't that what life is all about?

Editorial: Garden of Delights from Vogue US December 2006, Models: Karen Elson, Sasha Pivovarova, Caroline Trentini, Gemma Ward; Photographer: Steven Meisel via The Fashion Spot

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